Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Today's Driving Annoyance: HOV Lanes

"HOV" is an abbreviation for High-Occupancy Vehicles. Find the definition for HOV here. In Tennessee, the Tennessee Department of Transportation has designated lanes on certain interstates to be reserved for HOVs only (plus motorcycles, and excluding vehicles with three axles or more) during certain hours. During those hours, those who are driving vehicles with one occupant are to stay out of HOV lanes, period. They are not passing lanes, nor should the single-occupant vehicle driver feel it is okay to use those lanes during those hours, even for passing (which you are doing on the left, which is progress, to be sure).

While there has been legislation presented in the past (as well as in other states) to open up HOV lanes to those single-occupant drivers of hybrids and/or low-emission vehicles, you would be hard pressed to prove to me, Mr. Driver of a 2001 GMC Pick-up Truck With No Passengers that your vehicle meets the statutory definition of a High-Occupancy Vehicle.

Cheif Serpas: y'all are missing a great revenue stream. Start patrolling I-24 Southbound during the afternoon rush, and I'll betcha you'll be making some serious scratch!

Monday, January 22, 2007

A potential candidate with actual experience

Governor Bill Richardson has always seemed to me to be a unique combination of wonky guy who is also able to connect with the public. He has served in the Cabinet, as well as Ambassador to the UN (where, as I recall, he was a lot more popular than our now-former Ambassador, John Bolton, was). Plus, he has the oh-so-important experience of being a chief executive of a governmental body (a.k.a. The Great State of New Mexico).

Gosh, it makes me wonder what it would be like to actually have someone with some actual experience take over the job in '09.

In other news, The Stupid will probably be on a sort of hiatus-like thing for a little while. I am not abadoning The Stupid, as my work here is obviously not done. I do have some very serious shit to deal with in my life right now, though, that is going to require as much of my attention as I can give it. And if you pray or vibe or whatever, The Stupid Family could really use some. Thanks.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Massive T-Mobile Outage

If you're a T-Mobile customer in Nashville and Memphis, Tennessee; Birmingham and Mobile, Alabama; and Louisville, Kentucky, you probably do not have cell coverage right now. There is some sort of massive, multiple switchboard outage that is preventing calls from being connected to the towers.

The wait time for a tier-2 customer service rep was 1 hour, 20 minutes.

[Bedtime update: Still no service, over 3 hours after I was told they were going to have it handled in two hours (which I was told two hours after I was initially told it was going to be two hours).]

Friday, January 12, 2007

Anne's Shit List

When The Stupid was conceived (on a night of drunkeness which is now some fuzzy clump of vague memories in some reptillian nook of my brain, as it is with so many conceptions over time), I had planned on a regular segment to be called "Anne's Shit List." On it would be included those who richly deserved it. Over the past six-ish months of regular-ish postings, I have failed to populate the list.

I just wanted you to know that, at some point, The Shit List may appear in these here pages.

Or not.

Oh, like Colbert's Threatdown always has bears somewhere on it, Anne's Shit List will have Drivers who Refuse to use Their Turn Signals.

I wonder how much renting a billboard costs. I think I'd like to post a "Use your F&%*ing Turn Signal" sign up at various places around town. It might get some folks' much needed attention.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

More thoughts about the president's surge

To update this a little bit, I just stumbled across a NYT article that I found fascinating. One quote, in particular, leapt out at me:

“The government believes there is no need for extra troops from the American side,” Haidar al-Abadi, a Parliament member and close associate of Mr. Maliki, said Wednesday. “The existing troops can do the job.”

For all the talking last night about a democratic, sovereign Iraq, it would seem to me that the very root of sovereignty is the ability to tell another nation's military when and where they can be in your country, as well as how many of them can be there.

And the bloggers who are slavishly devoted to their president are really baffling in their demand that the Iraqi government behave the way we want them to.

They're not our children.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Knights of Prosperity

If you haven't seen this show, I highly recommend it.

You can watch it online.

When listening to the president...

I find it fascinating that he's making a list of benchmarks for the Iraqi government to meet.

I can't help thinking "or what?" What are we going to do if the Iraqi government decides to find its ovaries and say that they want a sectarian government, or that they don't want all sects to share equally in oil revenues?

Then what are we going to do? Invade the country?

I find it a great step forward that he took responsibility for the FUBARing of Iraq. It's a damn shame it took 4 years and 3000+ American lives (and heaven only knows how many Iraqi lives) for him to admit it.


I don't have OCD, but...

There most definitely is a right way and a wrong way to fold a towel.

I am listening to Barry Manilow at the office

I am either so cool that I don't care that people will think I am lame, or I am so lame that I am living down to people's expectations.

But, I dare you, hipsters, to throw on a little Copacabana on your iPod Shuffles, and see if it doesn't make you want to dance around your cube farm.

Or are you chicken?

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

An Open Letter to Nashville Drivers

We all must make a dick-like driving move every once in awhile. Perhaps some Hootie and the Blowfish came on the radio, and you had to turn it up and sing out loud, and just weren't paying attention. Perhaps you dropped a cigarette cherry in your lap and are trying to prevent full-thickness burns in your crotch. Maybe your kids are violating each other's personal space for the last time ever. I get it: we have things to do when we're driving that sometimes take our attention from the task at hand.


To further compound a dickish move by not using your turn signal makes you an asshole. Guy in the Blazer with state tags on Metrocenter Blvd getting on 65 North, I am talking to you, pal.

It is one thing to drive like a dick, but at least inform other drivers of your dick-esque intentions. At least we will have the opportunity to respond appropriately and defensively.

Signs of the Apocalypse

This was in my lawn.


In case you missed my "Tale of the Tape" post below, it is, allegedly, January in the Northern hemisphere of Planet Earth. Dandelions are not supposed to be growing in lawns.

[A little aside here, as I look at that picture. I have lived in 26 states, and Tennessee is the worst, by far, for growing grass. It just doesn't grow here. And I lived in the desert, for the love of Mike, and the grass was lush compared to here. Sorry; it's a gripe that's been weighing on my mind for 9 long years, and I just had to get it out.]

Ready to unload with both barrels...

Dear readers, it has been a day, lemme tell ya! Today was a hard, hard, hard day at work, the first one I've had there yet in 3.5 months-ish I've been there. I think I muddled through it okay, but it was touch and go there about 1:30 this afternoon.

Fortunately, I have the best supervisor ever, and, in my moment of need, she suggested a round of rummy. She proceeded to summarily whip my ass, but, it was, as she promised it would be, a major stress reliever! Plus, I haven't played rummy with an actual person in so long, it was really fun. She really is a great boss.

So, I have collected some thoughts, which I will summarize in blog posts over the course of the evening.

Monday, January 08, 2007

I Love New York!

If a young woman in your life needs some sort of cautionary tale, this show is it!

Actually, it's a great caution for the young man in your life, as well.

I am both entertained and horrified!

Is reality teevee the modern version of bread and circuses? Should I be concerned that my descendants, none of whom will know my name, be horrified that I was entertained by such pablum? Well, I put it out here for all to know: they can kiss my grits! Damn kids and their noise, anyway. And get off my lawn!

What is it with broken gas lines today?

Seriously, all over the world today, gas lines were broken. Bizarre.

I have come to a horrifying conclusion about myself

I think I may be an over-share-er.

I was just talking to a new friend, and, as I was telling her about the reason I am involved in a certain civic organization, I realized that I should probably shut the hell up. I mean, she hadn't asked, and we are at work, and I should not assume that just because she's cool that she is on the same political side as me. And the specific issue I was talking about is one that is laden with all sorts of emotions on both sides of the issue, so discussing it at work should be verboten, and I know that; I am the very portrait of Appropriate Workplace Behavior.

I mean, I want to toddle off over to her cube and tell her not only that I love Michelina's Salsbury Steak, but why I love its fatty, salty goodness so much, and that they were on sale 10 for $10 at Publix on Saturday when I went to do my grocery shopping, where Li'l Stupid Girl and I lucked into 20 peices of free deli fried chicken because someone cancelled an order...

Perhaps my lack of friends is contributed to by my oversharing. Who knows. The blog really should be the place where I overshare, not in the office.

The Apprentice 6 and/or "You're the One That I Want"

Anybody watch either or both of these last night? I really want to go to Grease Academy, but somebody should tell the would-be Apprentices that desparation is the world's worst cologne.

The Reunion We All Knew Would Come

Van Halen is among the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees, which is pretty cool, because I loved Van Halen. Can't wait to see Dave, Eddie, and Sammy all on the same stage. I predict seconds of hilarity, followed by days and days of oddness.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Tale of the tape

There are a couple of numbers I found interesting today. The first was the temperature when I was on my way to work at about 6:15 or so this morning.

Yes, folks, that says 63 degrees (and I was traveling more or less Northeast at the time). Today is January 5. I live in the northern hemisphere. The forecast high was 68. It was nice, but my crocuses are up already, and it's a little too early for that.

Now, why would the weather on this day be of interest to me, you may be (or probably not) asking yourself? Well, today is my birthday. Yup, it is lucky number

And, I got an awesome pen and a business card holder from Li'l Stupid Girl. She also picked out for me the awesomest birthday card. The poem reads:

A Poem for Your Birthday "All About Farts"

A fart can be quiet,
a fart can be loud,
some leave a powerful, poisonous cloud...

A fart can be short,
or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known
to sound just like a song...

A fat can create
a most curious medley,
A fat can be harmless
or silent, but deadly...

A fart might not smell,
while others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly,
or linger awhile...

A fart can occur
in a number of places,
And leave everyone with strange looks
on their faces...

From wide-open prairie,
to small elevators,
A fart will find all of us sooner or later...

But not all farts are bad,
this is simply not true--
We mustn't forget...

Dear, sweet, old farts like YOU!

I am the proudest mom who ever walked the planet!

From my darling husband, I received a mini SD card for my mp3 player, as well as

CSN Greatest Hits


Neil Young's Greatest Hits.

It's a great day, and I hope everybody celebrates!

Truth in advertising?

If only the Southy tagger could do such nice work.

Stupid Website of the Day

What a bunch of tools.

Ann Coulter and Washington Times do not disappoint with their omnipresent toolishness.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

In which I actually agree with Chris Hitchens

Even a broken clock is right twice a day, and this time, Christopher Hitchens has really captured my ambiguous feelings about Saddam and his ultimate demise. In his essay, Lynching the Dictator, Hitchens argues that there are still many Iraqis who never got the opportunity for justice, and that the US "helped to officiate at a human sacrifice."

It should be known I shed no tears for Saddam, but I cringe at what my nation, and, most particularly, my fellow countrymen have become: bloodthirsty, revenge-driven fantatics.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Liveblogging take 10 and final

Ludacris is on, who I love. But he's in LA, where it is currently 55 degrees. He is wearing a down vest and a hoodie. I used to wear such an outfit when I was living in Minnesota 97 or so years ago. But it was cold in Minnesota. And I never wore it inside. Again, yet more evidence I am so not hip.

Oh, and liveblogging has been fun, and I did it without one lesson! Next time, I'll get a partner. Jeffraham Prestonian is, I think, a worthy one.

Nighty-night, and happy new year, everybody.

Liveblogging take 9

Why the Fergie hate? Again, I am totally the anti-hip, but I really am digging on Fergilicious!

Liveblogging take 8

Seacrest's New Year's resolution: To retain less water.

Now, I don't wanna go all traditional gender roles on folks, but this is a man. Men should not worry aloud about retaining water. Or maybe I'm just more old-fashioned than I think.

Liveblogging take 7

Poptart with huge forehead: her name starts with an R, but because I have no concept of what "hip" music is these days, I couldn't identify her in a police lineup, except for the massive, encephalitic forehead. She looks kind of like Cromagnon, but with better hair.

Oh, apparently, her name is Rhianna. Whoever that is.

Liveblogging take 6

First New Year's quote from Mr. Stupid Girl, upon seeing Ryan Seacrest kissing Christina Aguilara:
He's giving her a big gay kiss? I'd bet he'd rather be kissing Clay Aiken.

Happy 2007, everybody.