Ready for some fun? Me, too!
First, in the category of "where the hell did you learn grammar,"
(by the way, these are all straight copy and pastes. I do no much-needed editing of the craigslist posts.)
(Please note that this is probably not fair of me, but the irony was just too delicious for me to pass up)
In the "Things are tough all over" category:
In the "Someone who really knows what he wants" category:
Last but not least, in the "What, you don't know who I am?" category: